About Me

Monday, April 2, 2012

B is for Baby Fever. Or, Biological Clock

I am participating in the Blogging A-Z April Challenge, a challenge where bloggers write about a topic associated with a certain letter each day. Today is the second day of the challenge and the letter is B.
baby bentrup

There once was a time when I had a major aversion to babies. Strangers' babies, friends' babies, any baby-I didn't care for them. They never looked cute to me; in fact, they looked red, slimy, and sticky. I thought they were smelly and loud. I never felt the urge to hold them. I used to feel irritated by sitting next to them in restaurants. And, I certainly never wanted one of my own.

I've always had a pet peeve with babies in my work space. I have never really understood women who have a baby and bring them into the office. Everyone stands around, cooing and ahhing, competing with one another to hold the baby. As a manager, I always pop myself out of the office, force myself to look at the baby, say "Oh, how cute" and then go back to work. I swore up and down that I would never! bring one of my future babies into the office. For years I even swore that I wouldn't be caught dead having a baby.

Years ago my boyfriend used to tease me that we would have three babies. He came from a family of three boys and wanted three children himself. "Hell no!" I used to say. "I don't want a child at all, but you want three. Can we compromise on just one?" I asked. He agreed. That conversation persisted until I was about 33 years old. Then one day I just stopped all my protesting.

A year and a half ago I rescued a dog that I thought was pregnant. (She wasn't). I suddenly became so nurturing towards her and her future puppies. A couple of months later, while out walking with my boyfriend and the dog, I started pointing out everything baby-a puppy, a baby bird, even-shall I say it?? (gasp)- little human babies all over the neighborhood. Then I started to notice and look at babies everywhere and even found myself once saying, "Oh, how cute!"

Now my baby fever had morphed into something else. Now I am completely obsessed with giving life. I want to plant and grow flowers, herbs and plants-although all of my life I have effectively boycotted gardening. I wonder if little bugs I see are babies. I want to read about baby caterpillars, tadpoles and I even think little baby mice are oh so cute. I see flowers sprouting from plants and trees, and cute little baby grass, plants or weeds sprouting in dirt or through cracks in the pavement.

Now I want to quit my job and start popping out five or six babies, and then adopt even more! I want to give up my job so that I can run around in the park all day long with my little babies and dogs. In three days I will be turning 36 and I think that I'm almost ready to have a baby!

Babies here, babies there; babies, babies, everywhere! Babies! Babies! Babies! I have baby fever!!

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